(Source: sleepsandstorm)

the gang marries their costars 

Kaitlin Olson (Dee) and Rob McElhenney (Mac)
Jill Latiano (Caylee) and Glenn Howerton (Dennis)
Mary Elizabeth Ellis (The Waitress) and Charlie Day (Charlie)

(Source: keepingupwiththecanadians, via askinnyblackman)

whatevrdoe:

i n t o  t h e  w o o d s: first look

OH MY GOD.

(Source: captainrogerss)

jesusinc:

jesusinc:

Petition to make Joe from princess diaries the new anonymous icon

image

(via cargaydiem)

234,453 notes

rydenarmani:

a rant about the women against feminism hashtag

Note to self: “I love you” does not mean “I won’t ever leave you. Note 1. (via lesb0)

(Source: fragmentallygirl, via heart)

149,361 notes

taco-marco:

staff:

starting today all blogs without the following image will be deleted within 24 hours

image

i’m not even afraid of deletion. i just want this image on my blog

aw shucks get it girl!

(Source: dddderrnsuree, via perfectly-imperfect-flawsforlife)

162,711 notes

prettybooks:

Bloomsbury Children’s Books revealed the complete set of new Harry Potter covers today! They’re so beautiful. Prisoner of Azkaban is my favourite, if you couldn’t tell. They’re published on 1st September in paperback and hardback, and illustrated by Jonny Duddle. 

(via bangbang08)

bevsi:

modern disneys 

(via rapunzelaisaka)

the-misadventures-of-lele:

zyzil:

princess-azula:

grapefruitshampoo:

imnotthereasonthatyoureinsane:

tephnos:

sirisles:

dixiesaurer:

aaronwarner-anderson:

mongezeas:

g0kudera:

sarahdesdemona:

ninth-level-of-awesome:

I love how Tumblr teaches us how to be perfect criminals.

Also, if you’re burying a full body, make sure you bury them vertically. Satellites orbiting earth look for holes that are approx. 6ft long because that’s suspicious. Ideally though, drain your body of fluids in a tub ((mix fluids with bleach and let them soak before draining and take precautions to keep your house from smelling like death from your sink and whatnot. Draining the body also keeps decomp at bay a bit and makes it easier to portion)) and cut it to bits. It’s easier to bury a head than a whole body, and takes less time so you don’t have to tell your neighbors, “Oh, I’m night gardening!”

Also, if a dog happens across it, it’s more likely it will devour a single body part than all of your ex-husband.

Another method is to put it into a septic tank. They’re a plethora of bacteria, and the smell of waste covers the smell of decomposition very well.



You should also destroy all teeth, massacre the face and burn fingerprints/remove finger tips to keep from identifying by anything other than DNA.

…I didn’t come up with these ideas, just what I’ve gleaned from reading on the internet.

i used to joke about Tumblr teaching us how to get away with murder, but fuck, man

the thing is when i see this i want to go kill a man just because i have the knowledge

thanks tumblr

Remember when you’re at the crime scene to wipe down all surfaces and then take the victims hands and touch things with them. Pick up cups and run the hands along table tops. A room with zero fingerprints is very suspicious.

If you live near the ocean you can drain the body and cut up the cadaver into small pieces then mix it all together with fish parts and dispose of it easily by pretending to chum the water for fish and sharks. Actually do chum the water a bit before dumping in your victim to be sure there are plenty of hungry fish around. Stick around and fish for a while so anyone who happens to see you won’t get suspicious. This way you don’t have any body parts lying around waiting to be dug up and identified. Plus you might catch a marlin or something.

PLUS YOU MIGHT CATCH A MARLIN

I AFDGFHGKJHKHGFDSF I AM DONE

Don’t forget that the chances of being caught are greatly reduced if you murder someone who has no connection to you at all. Most murderers end up killing someone they know in some fashion, so they’re easily caught. Serial killers kill at random, hence why they can kill a lot before they screw up.

I am not a serial killer, honest.

I am seriously concerned for all of you

please don’t judge me for tagging this for future reference, IT’S FOR PURELY FICTIONAL PURPOSES OK

I’M PRETTY SURE THE NEXT TIME I SEE THIS POST, ADVICE ON BURYING BODIES WILL ADD UP UNTIL IT SUFFICES TO BE COMPILED AS A HANDBOOK

How to kill a bitch: a guide by tumblr

this really is a mental institute.

for those in the south, gator pits and/or dens can be your best friend in that situation…just sayin

(Source: actualadvicemallard, via proseandgrace)

thesimpsonswayoflife:

Ralph Appreciation Post - Part IV

amerikoismywaifu:

eternallybliss:

This is so perfect, for the time you look at this image, you don’t know if it’s a boy and girl, a girl and a girl, a boy and a boy, a black man and a white girl, a white man and an asian girl, you know nothing. Just the simplicity of the connection and the beauty of two human beings sharing love and that is all that should ever matter.

Actually, Due to the slight prognathism of the maxilla, the smaller more rounded cranial vault. The sharper and less defined lower mandible, and less protruding supraobital ridges, the conclusion can be reached that the individual on the left is female, and of African American decent. However the individual on the right shows a larger more oblong cranium, heaver more protruding supraobital ridges, a flatter maxilla with less prognathism. Also the lower mandible of this individual is heaver, more defined and square. From the presence of these features the conclusion can be reached that the individual on the right is male of Caucasian decent. Also due to the advanced (but not complete) obliteration of the cranial sutures, and the presence of a third molar in each individuals, it can also be said that both of these individuals are between the ages of 25 and 40. image

i just

(via penguinmellark)

ejacutastic:

kill the imposter

(Source: blaaargh, via fatpeoplemakemehappy)

hho-hhe:

When someone unfollows me I take it very personally.

(via crystallized-teardrops)